THE WHY:
Most of you know why I'm doing this marathon; but to give you a brief synopsis I'm doing it to prove to myself that I can do anything, to be a role model to my kids that exercising is an important part of a healthy lifestyle, that it's never to late to go for your dreams, to be in that elite (I've run a marathon) group, to be able to push through when things are hard, to make myself stronger mentally and physically, to live life to it's fullest with no regrets and to experience every emotion that comes with this journey are just a few of the reasons.
Last year, I distinctly remember watching the NYC Marathon on tv, in awe of all those runners who made a commitment to themselves and/or their communities. I idolized them, I desperately wanted to be one of them, I was jealous of their physical capabilities and mental strength, I was envious of the confidence in themselves to begin training for the marathon and ultimately watch them cross the finish line after what I imagined were months of arduous training and careful planning seemed like such an amazing feat to me.
I realized that I no longer wanted to be on the sidelines, wishing and hoping that maybe some day that too could be me. I was sick of ho-humming around, not really being honest with myself and what I wanted to accomplish, feeling afraid that if I said my dream out loud that it would all of a sudden become "real" and once it was real I would have to address it and either go for it or live with regret.
Last October, I ran in a half marathon back home in Hershey, PA. It was a great experience. Getting back into training felt good. The training for a half marathon was 10 weeks long and the distance...well according to other people....is just long enough. I personally wanted to die by mile 11. It felt great to accomplish another half and to finish even faster than the one I ran in Denver 5 years prior. But I still had that itch...that itch that I could apply myself even more, that itch to really go for it.
Watching the NYC Marathon a few weeks later, confirmed the internal conflict I was having with myself. I made up my mind. I did not want to let fear of failure hold me back from trying something (run a marathon). A few days later and without much hesitation I did it. I signed up for the lottery process for getting into the NYC Marathon. When I didn't get in via lottery (my best friend and running buddy Devon got in this way), I knew the only other way to gain entry was by running for a charity. I chose the Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America for obvious reasons and it's been a win-win situation. I haven't looked back since.
TRAINING:
Training has definitely had it's ups and downs. Over the past weeks, I've spent many a late night reading everything I can get my hands on. Running, I have that down pat. All I have to do is put one foot in front of the other. You tell me which day and the distance and I have it covered! Nutrition....that's a different story. The more I researched, the more confused I became. Everything I read was different or contradicting to what I previously read.
In my previous profession as an accountant, I am hard wired to respond better to black and white answers. I don't want to think outside of the box and be creative. Just tell me what to do and I'll do it. But with nutrition it's different...because everyone is different. I've asked friends of mine that have run in marathons, fellow New York Road Runners, Team Challenge teammates and even a few professionals during their open question sessions about what I should eat and when and in what amounts. They all said the same thing...everyone is different. I was so frustrated. In the beginning I was essentially looking for a black and white answer, an equation (my weight * distance running = amount of carbs to eat). I finally received a good answer that I've come to accept. My girlfriend who has run in 3 previous marathons said it best "that's what the training is for." It completely didn't occur to me that the training for 18 weeks was for more than just building up your running endurance. It's also the time you need to really explore what works best for you body. I have been eating a wide variety of carbs, in varying ratios and during different times pre and post run and I write it all down and how I felt during that run. It's a time to recognize what works and doesn't so that on race day, you have it down. Now that my mileage is creeping up there, I'm eating carbs at every meal along with protein and healthy fats. I complained about having to eat pancakes on Saturday morning to carb load for my run on Sunday and Scott looked like he wanted to kill me! Haha. Eating carbs in mass quantities really isn't as easy as you would think. (The stuff I'm learning!)
I've picked the famous Hal Higdon Novice 1 Marathon Training Program. It consists of 18 weeks of hard training starting with a total of 15 miles during week one and building up to running a total of 40 miles during week 15. Every third week is a stepback week where the mileage is reduced to allow your body to heal and prepare for the next push upward. I've just completed week 10 out of 18 and now it is not uncommon for me to run a half marathon distance every weekend. (Expanding my goals feels great!) The first 9 weeks I've run approximately 177 miles. The second half of training, the remaining 9 weeks I will run a total of 258 miles. All of the runs get progressively longer to build up your endurance and to help your body adjust to carb loading and using that stored energy efficently. It's also helping my lungs to process oxygen more effectively too among a lot of other science-y stuff I won't get into.
THE JOURNEY:
It's funny how just 10 months ago I felt such a huge sense of accomplishment running and finishing a half marathon. Then in February I was sick and had surgery and basically had to take a full 2 months off from doing exercise of any kind. All of a sudden I found myself back at square one. I've learned that literally to climb a mountain, you do it one step at a time. The same goes for running...I still struggle with some of my shorter runs (4 miles) and have to literally force myself to take it one step at a time. There are times where I am overcome with anxiety about how much more training and running I have to do to get prepared for this one race...but when the anxiety builds I have to dial it back in. I force myself to focus on one run a day and take it day by day. Back in week 1, looking at the training schedule I never would have thought I could run 15 miles in week 10 yet that is just what I did on Sunday. Was it easy?!...NO....absoultely NOT! But I did it. Those 15 miles really screwed with me mentally but that's when I really have to register and process what I am doing. It was tough and after running 13, I wouldn't have been able to turn around and do it again if they told me too. I admit that I am not ready to run 26.2 miles yet but I still have 8 weeks ahead of me to turn that 15 miles into another 5. (My longest training run will be 20 miles). Realizing that I have come a long way already but recognizing that there is plenty more training to do to get my body AND my mind ready for Nov. 2nd is comforting.
Throughout this process I have already learned a lot. It's amazing where your mind wanders and the thoughts that enter your head when you have countless hours of running. I have really opened my way of thinking about what I want to accomplish. I've realized that life is not about setting boundaries but about breaking them, I don't want to limit myself but rather live life without limits, I don't want to be fearful of what if's but rather take life by the horns and make of it what I want. In life there are no do-overs, no one owes you anything, you make your own destiny. Just go for it! I am high on life and loving every second of it. No more wasting energy on would have, should have, could have.
I have also spent a lot of time deciding what happens next. I don't want to get trapped into post-marathon blues. (Yeah, it's a real thing. You can read about it here)). So I'm focusing on what I want to accomplish next... here are some current thoughts swirling around inside my head:
1- become a yogis
2- consume myself with crossfit training
3- go skydiving
4- hike the Appalachain Trail
5- go to the Great Wall of China
6- sit and be still and mediate, essentially do nothing
7- focus on establishing deeper connections and stronger ties to family and friends
8- research schools for my dear children for next year
9- volunteer
10- get my CPA
11- go back to work
12- start my own business
13- travel more
14- have another baby
Okay. That's the current list. There are lots of ideas but I've had lots of time to think about them. Who knows what the future holds, but it's looking bright and I'm hopeful!
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| A short run to build up my endurance so I can start the training program. |
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| A little inspiration for me on the kitchen wall. |
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| All of my details on nutrition and training. |
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| One of my first runs. |
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| I felt like I was going to die running mile 11 up hill so to take my mind off of what felt like my last moments I snapped a picture. |
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| During my run in Central Park. Some runners looked like this to me. They were just floating by me with no effort at all. |
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| Meanwhile I felt like this while running. |
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| My first race during training in Central Park. |
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| This comic strip made me laugh. Everyone knows how much I love cupcakes. |
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| I ran 7 miles this day in my new Team Challenge shirt. |
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| Getting the miles in even when in PA. |
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| Compression sleeves are not glamorous but get the job done. |
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| I ran a half marathon early in the morning. It was really peaceful and I inspired myself. If I can do that by myself, then surely I can run double that with 2 million people watching. |
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| It feels so good to check of the runs as I complete them. |
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| My secret ammunition. Sometimes during mile 10 I am so mentally fatigued that I just need to remember I have these on my shoes to get out of a funk. Isaiah 41:10 So do not fear for I am with you; do not dismay, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous hand. Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. |
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| I've seen my fair of beautiful sites while running on pristine, hidden roads. But this site holds so much promise. |
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| At the Putnam County Classic Half Marathon in Brewster, NY. The Hudson Valley is so gorgeous but also very hilly. :) |
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| It's amazing the people I've ran across or come in contact with. Olympian Kara Goucher answered my question (jjmuir) about supplements on Instagram! |
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| How I feel after a bad run. |
