At the beginning of training, my thoughts about race day were of whether or not I could even complete it? Did I have it in me? Slowly over time, as I became more confident in my abilities with each step, those worries gradually melted away and my thoughts shifted slightly to the following; what will the weather be like? what if it rains? what if I twist my ankle? what if I don't get enough sleep? what if I have a flare up? You get the idea....lots of what ifs? Over the last few weeks during the taper, as I start to slow down and recover physically, there is time to build up mentally. My realization: There will be plenty of what ifs come race day....come every day.....but I don't care. It could be pouring rain on race day, I don't care. I could twist my ankle in a storm drain, I don't care. What if I have to stop at every port-a-potty? I don't care. I will still do my best at whatever it is I'm doing. I'm going to give it my all. I will hobble in torrential downpour if I have too. I'm going to finish.
Running teaches you to push through it. There will always be hiccups in the road, there will always be things that don't go exactly how you imagine they would. You can't let those little things that happened affect how you react in the future.
A few pieces of advice fellow runners have given me: 1) "embrace and expect the unexpected.: Undoubtedly, something will happen during the race to throw me off my game, it will try to get into my head....It may be a side stitch, swelling in my knees, a toenail digging into another toe, a muscle cramp in my back, chaffing on my thigh or under my arm, nausea, etc. Knowing a head of time that these things can happen and have happened during training, I know what they feel like, I know what I need to do to push through it, and because I've encountered it already, I know that I can handle it if I encounter it again. 2) "Prepare mentally: 26.2 miles really isn't that far considering how many miles you have already logged during training." I've run many half marathon distance runs, a 14, 16, 18, and 20 mile run and half of those runs have been ran by myself. Having other runners around and hundreds of thousands of people cheering should make those 26.2 miles fly by. Trust in the training. Believe in yourself. 3) Get a great nights sleep two nights before. The night before, most novice runners don't get any sleep because of nerves and also because they are up all night going to the bathroom. It's a good sign that you are well hydrated! 4) Think of it this way: An Olympic gymnast spends 4 years training for the vault that only takes 2.5 seconds. You train for 4 or 5 months for the marathon and get to enjoy an entire days worth of success.
The last post I wrote about training was almost 5 weeks ago. During that time, I did one more half marathon race in Central Park, I've also ran a 20 miler as well as other shorter runs and got sick! I was really bummed about getting sick. By week 15 my body was exhausted from the constant pounding it was taking during training. Things I've just recently learned is that your immune system is compromised after a long run. I've also learned that it's okay to say No! My longer runs were typically on a Sunday morning if I didn't have a race that weekend and bright and early on Monday I would drop off the kids at school. A place where new germs, sneezing, slobber and boogers are an everyday occurrence during the beginning of school and when the seasons change. I definitely caught something from one of the kids and having an already compromised immune system from my Crohn's disease I was predisposed to getting sick . I was out for the count for an entire week. I didn't have the energy to make meals, let alone go for a run. I had the chills, fever, body aches, no appetite, and a bad bad cough that still hasn't completely gone away. It was a vicious cycle. I was starting to get a little anxious about the race and having to miss some runs made me even more anxious. I was worried that an entire week of not training could wipe out the past few weeks of hard work. Talking with my fellow teammates made me feel much better and assured me that it was okay and recommended to take even a few extra days off after I started to feel better. They said that although I couldn't prepare physically I could prepare in other ways, prep my race gear, study the course, check the weather, plan my recovery, post run food, transportation. So that's what I did. To get back into running mode mentally I've read some inspirational articles, and also watched some youtube videos on marathons. I even watched a movie called The Spirit of the Marathon. Wow- that movie can get anybody to want to run a marathon. I decided to write down every inspirational quote from the movie to be able to read back to myself. Within the first 2 minutes this is what I wrote down:
- Sometimes the moments that challenge us the most define us.
- It's about life, you're going to hit those hiccups and rough patches and it's about how you come through them
- When you cross the finish line no matter how slow or how fast it will change your life forever
Then I wrote down a few more quotes from the remainder of the movie.
- The marathon is the modern man's Mt. Everest
- Sometimes you're mind shuts off and you lose a few miles and you aren't thinking of anything (this happens to me between miles 8 and 11)
- You train for 4 or 5 months and then get to the start line and there is always some skepticism about the distance. - Deena Kastor
- The marathon is triumph over adversity - once you've done that there is nothing in life you can't triumph over.
So inspired!
I have also been a complete party pooper during the month of October and I'm okay with that. I've had to turn down so many invitations this month to do fun things because of my training and wanting to conserve my energy and not wear myself thin. November is another month and everything can wait until then. Prioritizing is of utmost importance.
One more thing, last but certainly not least. At about the 1 month till race day mark, I started to get super nervous. I mean really nervous and anxious just thinking about this race. Almost debilitating. Sometimes I build it up in my head so much that it's silly. I actually considered going to the doctor and getting some anxiety medication or seeking professional help. Mental anxiety is what the runners call it. This race is just supposed to be fun but it's also a very serious and momentous occasion for me. It's a chance for me to prove that there is more to me than what I know. A thought every runner has. Push past those limits. Hit the wall. There are lots of different phrases for it. They say you run the first 1/3 with you body, the second 1/3 with your head and the last 1/3 with your heart. I have been so open and welcoming of all the emotions and ups and downs the body experiences during training, heck during every run, but the fear of failure started creeping in. It was perfect timing for us to have a MOPS meeting about fear last week and I asked our mentor mom who is also the wife of the pastor at the church what advice she has for reducing fear and anxiety, She said to hand it all over to God. She told me to picture him standing in front of me with open arms and hands extended and hand all my anxiety and worry and fear over to him and let him handle it. And once I hand it over to him I can't take it back. So I did and it worked. God works in such mysterious ways and has a far better plan for us than what we have for ourselves. It's amazing, truly amazing to feel such relief. Now I can sit back and enjoy all the fun bits and pieces of the process. Until next time, when I post about race day as a marathoner.....BLESSINGS TO YOU.
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| Grete's Great Gallop Half Marathon in Central Park and my second best time. |
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| The tribute wall. I again felt compelled to write something to my father in law. |
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| My almost 20 miler. |
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| A massage to work out the lactic acid. |
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| Catch me if you can. Felt like I was flying this day. |
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| Watching Spirit of the Marathon on hulu.com |
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